Not a fireman, but good enough for last night.
you wouldnt answer to anything but devil's advocate all night.
Just wrote a paper about alcohol abuse that sounded like my weekend...
can't believe I ate straight coffee grounds to stay awake for that
The secrurity code on my debit card is 420, can not lose this card.
You don't have to believe me. My vagina knows it happened.
we should hire that guy that makes pancakes that we met last weekend for our next party. He can feed us, and regulate!
Have I told you recently that I love you, if for no other reason than you make my irresponsible substance abuse look tame by comparison?
He's cute when he's drunk, too. Also he tried to fight my door...
She just shoved like three McNuggets in her mouth and started sobbing and I have no idea what's going on.
I don't miss having sex with him. We had our finale fuck last week. He's all yours now.
The things I do for you. Not that I'm unhappy about it. I'm just saying you should love me.
Did you sleep with him again?
No! I just led him to believe that I would if he gets me booze. Do I have that little class that you have such minimal faith in me?
Sometimes I feel like I should become a beautician purely for my ability to shave pretty shapes into my pubic hair.
Im so glad I make morally wrong decisions. It's like the best worst thing I've ever done.
There is no issue with you seeing me...morally or ethically. we'll update your resume anyway. I really need to have sex with you later. Really
Randomize
