yes we were fucking thats why i put "watching a movie" in quotations
Vaginas are confusing as hell with all their secret compartments and shit.
I'll get my vaginal cartography poster.
Just found custom condoms. Guess I'm not getting any work done today.
Unless you can cure my hangover with your penis I'm not interested.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Lesbian sex in an alleyway drunk.
I baptized my dog in my pool last night because he snapped at my party guests, how was your night?
Just grabbing my bra from a history teacher's desk in the Humanities building. Maybe I should stop drinking on weeknights
He's texting from midnight mass asking for nude pics. Baby Jesus is spinning in his manger as we speak
Seriously, don't even. "Hi, have I seen you half naked covered in bright red body paint on the internet?" is NOT acceptable water-cooler chit-chat.
Aw.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Have you seen our bachelor? He's MIA. Last seen being led to some hookers by Kanye look-a-like.
He was hammered and shot his pistol into the lawn. Next thing I know sheriffs are at our house with M4s. He likes to party
btw my ex came by last night and saw the pregnancy test intructions. awkwarrrrd.......
I just found out my younger brother has me saved in his contacts as "Womb Primer" and I don't know what to do with this information
he just fucked me for my cheese..
It’s so white trash that I almost have to have it.
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