Can i come over
After you called me a desperate slut? No
Come over
No, I'm a firm believer in "Swallow or it isn't love."
she looked like she should be chained to micheal vicks radiator
70 feet underwater and I sharted my wetsuit, Tide pen won't clean this up.
We were in the backseat and he was giggling uncontrolably. It felt like I was giving head to a 10 year old girl.
I walked in on him shirtless licking the mirror while talking to his reflection. So yes, I definitely want to do shrooms the next time you get them.
I really need to find better places to throw up. I would like to be able to use the bathroom sink the next morning for brushing my teeth
Definitely just said "no homo" to our gay waiter at Cheesecake Factory...our service has steadily declined since.
I found his retainer in my ass crack. It smells like shame.
Yes, you can 69 in a fiat. But I think I have permanent nerve damage
You are the epitome of what awesome would taste like.
Were you the one who yelled "FOR GLORYHOLE!" then punched a hole through my door?
I got a message the other day that just said “great tits”
A gentleman AND a scholar
I discovered moonshine and fell in love.
He pulled out the guitar, sat in tub, and took requests while she puked her brains out in the toilet. I think he loves her.
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