SEEEEXXX PLEASE
I saw her while sober, and she is definately cut off from the penis ride
Learn some fucking English or leave me alone! "Your" is for something that belongs to you, like 'your herpes'. And "you're" is a contraction for "you are", like "you're not sleeping with me".
The lesbians are drunkenly meowing in the hallway again. This is the shit I'll miss at home.
the way i see it, im about one adderall binge away from graduating
You just want to fuck a girl in a dinosaur costume, don't you?
They won't let us do straight shots of 151 since that guy lit his face on fire.
i refuse to hook up with a girl that looks like drew carey.
Don't matter if she's straight, I'll get her. I'm not called The Transformer for nothing
I feel like there's no sexy way to pull 12 condoms out of your bra.
Do you have any puffy paint? I want to put "fiesta muthafuckas" on my sombrero but its too much to bedazzle.
someone cut his neck open pretty bad with a broken beer bottle. We were so close to his house that we carried him home, but when we got there he casually laid on his bed and said he was just gonna sleep it off. WHO DOES THAT
So I just got drugs from a house with a giant cross on it. Thank you, Jesus.
She's the perfect storm of great hair, big boobs, intellectualism, and mild moral ambiguity.
I can't believe it is only 1:30...I may have to stab myself with scissors for an excuse to go home...
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