Nick had a break down & said to me "Everybody's mad at me, I'm the douchebag, Im the fucking douchebag that everyone hates, Do you wanna come home with this douchebag?!"
You're going home with him aren't you?
I'll see ya in the morning when I leave his house
needless to say, I hope she has to get an abortion again
then again I'm sitting on a tree stump completely naked in the dark listening to some type of glee soundtrack.
Suuuuuuper drunk and just sang fuck her gently to the chiminea. I'm in bad shape.
So I realized I was officially over him when I was getting a lap dance on the keg bus at 3am from his old boss and I was double fisting:)
Attn: you have now used your free, one time admission to pleasure town. Thank you for visiting I hope you enjoyed your trip. All future trips to P.T. Will cost you full admission price. We have different pricing plans to accommodate different situations, and remember it is more of a bartering system than a set price. Your patronage is always welcomed and once again thank you for visiting and have a fantastic evening.
I was up all night on suicide watch. Dave was wasted and tried to strangle himself. With his own hands.
Pretty sure encouraging you to sleep with 2 different girls while keeping you in the good graces of both has lost me the ability to call myself a woman. But that's just the kind of friend I am; dedicated.
He took the bartender's challenge and took a Jello shot with a tarantula frozen inside.
Can I just skip the lesson I have planned for tomorrow and just teach my students about Prohibition using my impending hangover?
This is why american education is failing
Yess he was literally so drunk that like at one point I'm pretty sure he thought it was hard and in when neither were true :/ haha
We climaxed at the same time during ain't no mountain high enough. Does it get more cheesy or domestic for a non relationship?
I'm sorry I was just sleeping on the kitchen floor I'm too dead to think
THE AUSTRALIAN IS SINGLE AS FUCK.
I always felt my time would come in the form of a tidal wave of whisky
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