im surounded by vag. Like smog aound LA, i am suffocating in an atmosphere of pussy
Remind me to tell you about the dream where im a fighting a super hero whose only weakness is sunkist.
Oh and then this old man who saw it happen goes "don't do that"
Hahaha what a helpful old man. Like you thought it was normal to be spilling gas everywhere.
Come on, video tape it. Take one for the team
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I want to fuck you with a popsicle till it melts then eat it out of you
Really.
I swear every time I make the effort to make my hair look nice, someone jizzes in it.
Guess who left Professor Cunt on their paper by accident?
I'm fighting fire with fire. When my parents interrogate me about what I was doing last night, I tell them the truth. Every disgusting, awkward detail. I'm 23 now and they need to get used to it.
We haven't said piping hot jizz in awhile... that needs to come back into our conversations
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My roommate said I banged on the wall and said, "this dude eats pussy like a champ."
My sister was borrowing my phone when the sext came through. She just said "wow. He's got a nice dick!" Then went on like nothing happened. Outed by a dick pic and its no big deal. Best sister ever.
I have just found the cubicle of sustenance. And I will rejoice at all the families that have not found this magic. This vodka cubicle of magic.
But now I'm just thinking when he said he "worked for the airline" he actually meant drug smuggling.
I'm currently in h&m wondering "what exactly is the class level of a swingers resort?"
Everyone is all excited about the iPhone 7 being water resistant and I'm only concerned with whether or not it can be destroyed by salsa or cum
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