Pretty sure I only gave out my other # though. You know, 777 777-7777
Hahaha. So was it a Freudian slip, or wishful thinking? ;)
Could be either seeing as you're in my phone as "3rd bar" and I couldn't pick you outta a line up.
Helping a hot freshman girl move in = 2 hours of my life One bottle of cheap vodkas = $10 Watching her do the walk a shame on her first morning away from home = Priceless
i think im the only person who makes thank you cards for their drug dealer
the towel caught on fire outside the hottub but we were all too stoned to care
Then he told me he was proud of me for remembering that i blew him that night.. Maybe my drinking is getting out of hand.
He went around feeding all the high kids pretzels. He's like their god now
The lifeguard told us we had to move Mike before the tide came in when he passed out.
some guy just burried his vomit in the sand.
Yeah...don't think he was sober. He kept screaming "I fucking love this game!". It was his Chase app.
And then we were riding the keg in the pool like an 8 second rodeo...naked.
It's like you know you got fucjed up when you wake up and check fir your own pulse
I thought i didnt really feel whatever i snorted last night until i just realized i think i asked this dude to punch me fight club style
He is so pussy whipped she has made him change his name to Toby
Also if i get drunk and start crying about the elephants you all have my permission to abandon me.
Im going to the gym...covered in the Brazilians cum
And how is that different than any other weeknight in your world
Randomize
