a strip club that doesn't allow touching or asking for sex... whats the point?
unless her vagina can tell me my horoscope in sign language, I'm not going.
I got to stop making out with my boss at work. I think we should just get it overwith, be dissaponted and move on.
I actually had to roll up my long sleeves to masturbate. I hate the winter
Oh well. haha. i couldn't really understand what she was saying. i just nodded a lot. i guesss she found that sexy.
gotta love spring break
gotta love slutty girls from the south
I just got over my period in 3 days...I believe that is god's way of saying "go fuck an amazingly attractive Italian boy on vacation"
I just told my sister I love her. I'm in no condition to drive.
Yea he called the cop officer fonzarelli and asked him if he was mad because happy days was off the air. Boom, beaten and arrested
We're both great liars, in committed relationships, and horny. Its the perfect storm of cheating
So help my penis see only you. Give him some attention as well.
You told me that they girl who was giving you a handjob under the table looked a little like your sister
My bank account got hacked so he showed up with a 6 pack wearing a superman cape to cheer me up and you question why I love him?
Did I tell you guys I was bisexual last night? I just had a flashback
I woke up with my shoes on but pants in the fish tank
Congratulations on giving me my first and second hickeys last night. I made it almost 30 years without one, but who needs class these days?
I threw up outside. Then I peed got off the toilet and threw up. While I threw up u pulled up my pants. Not my best moment
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