Tell her she's as useless as a condom.
do you think the kids from 7th heaven are mad that dennis and sweet dee are their half-brother and sister?
there is a large number of people floating in the fountains the morning in inter-tubes...its only 930. did i miss something?
hes like the used car salesman of hook ups and closed the deal w my taking him home with me,as is,today
I can't even go pee because I'm making sure he doesn't run off somewhere naked.
Babe. You eat pussy like a god warrior sent from a galaxy far far away to destroy female genitalia with new realms of pleasure. That's how I know your not gay.
He wanted to bang in the work van while we were on shift together. He convinced me with "It's like the Scooby Doo van but looks nothing like the Scooby Doo van."
The last time I thought I had a UTI, I ended up having herpes. Sooo.. This time in preparing myself for cancer or death.
I'm going through a really dark time right now
I don't want to hear it man. I just jerked it to a pic of my ex wife in a bikini. Buck up
Hyyypothetically, what would you do if you happened to see my boobs on the internet?
Note to self: don't try to shave your legs when sex-sore. You CANT reach, stop trying.
He slept outside in his hammock, and then took a lawn chair with him in the shower because he was too drunk to stand up.
what happened last night?
we watched you eat an entire bag of dorritos in the pouring rain... you refused to come inside
Ever been to a strip club with one stripper? I have. And she sucked.
I don't want a big night. But I am okay if we wake up in a penthouse at Crown Casino.
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