he put his p in my v, then his p in my a, and then tried to put the p in my m? first, double dipping is rude. second, i'm glad he finished shortly after that, i'm afraid of where he'd try to stick it next. my ear?
it felt like I walked into a Tool Academy challenge
i knew she was high when she broke up the cookies into her glass of milk and ate it like cereal
i would hope so, cause i don't think 'i drove off the road because i was getting some head' is covered in insurance
I wish i had more things to dip in ranch... That's the most stoner thing i've ever said
they pretty much knew i was there to get drunk and fuck their daughter
please tell me why my pillow is wearing your thong...
...i wondered where i left that...
I mean, I'm twenty four years old and I've never paid for my own drink. You can't say that any of your ex girlfriends boobs are THAT great.
Dude he fell into my wall and left an imprint then decided to have sex with the door open. Vents carry noise pretty well
We all just did coke and we're coloring so if you're sober its pointless for you to come over here
Sorry I invoked the "everyones getting smacked including myself policy last night"
There's a bus with a band full of dancing women in bras. I think I like it here.
I've officially dedicated my newly single life to making myself squirt.
Charging my vibrator at work. Pray to god I don't forget it!!!
Not sure she's stomping around my apartment muttering incoherently about wanting to speak to the colonel
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