Question: terrible or awesome when a girl give you head so vigorously that you get a hickey of sorts
just saw a DUI checkpoint outside of a taco bell...i feel like thats cheating...
Call me at 7:30 and make sure I'm not asleep in this booth at Waffle House.
he was persistant. I supposedly owe him a bj from high school.
sometimes you have to go after what you want
true. and i really want to cum
We just took turns doing keg stands. 27 is way too old for this. Out of 5 of us, our best time was 9 seconds.
i tried to knight her with my dick. she said it was unromantic. what an ungrateful attitude for a knight.
My dream had 1 penis and 2 pizzas in it. Priorities?
only i would grind with someone to harp music at a gay wedding
Wouldn't life be so much easier if you could just walk up to attractive men and say, "Let me bear your children" and it wouldn't be creepy?
Or possibly end in a restraining order?
but there's so much I wanna do before I have kids. like die
Last night I was introduced as the Picasso of getting fucked up so I obviously had to live up to it by chugging long islands
Do not try to steal a picnic table from a park, all you will end up with are sore arms and broken dreams.
The amount of drunk I'm going to get tonight will be somewhere between Jim lahey and bojack horseman
Alone, in the dark, eating tacos and drinking vodka. Who's apartment is this?
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