Dude i fell asleep inside of her
thats awesome
I asked him if he wanted to go to my place, he said i could go but he was gonna stay
No. I remember how loud you used to get. Trust me.
its not that he announces that he can deep throat a banana its the fact he knows he can and it makes me wonder how he found out
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
no more duck duck goose at the bar
Its 11am, im in the city in a pocahontas outfit, lost a heel and found a gold rolex in my lingerie.
There's a warrant out for his arrest for throwing a mannequin through a bus stop.
They tried. Someone started to yell beer shower but he spun around and punched them in the mouth before they even finished saying beer. He's a fast little drunk.
We didn't have sex because he locked himself in the bathroom and passed out while he was taking a shit. I cuddled with his cat.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
whatever the appropriate amount of shots is to consider drunken acrobatics a good idea was a few less than I actually had
she's like a sexy human version of my cat. i can't catch her, and she keeps throwing up in the corners.
found $100 my ex got arrested and I can receive free health insurance I gotta tell ya 2014 is really going to be my year
I walked outside and found some random guy passed out on our front porch. We managed to acquire the 12 pack of lagers he had so it's all good.
Dude did you see that video of yourself crying while bathing in vodka on YouTube?
So there i was right, midnight, washing my junk off in my bathroom sink.
Randomize