I like it. Barfy the gin-flavoured Assman
woke up to find a pram in the balcony. first thing we did was look over the edge!
These people keep looking at me like I'm the first person to ever eat ribs in a Home Depot.
i had the all of mcdonalds chanting USA as he motorboated you
Shaun got a portable breathalyzer for christmas so now we can tell who the biggest pussy is at the end of the night.
He was going down on me and raised up for a minute, slipped and punched me in the face. My lady boner left immediately.
FYI, your girlfriend is on her way to the ER. She tried to balance a bottle of jack on her chest. Smashed toes, blood all over patio. Call her, kinda funny though.
It was kicking off big time until you crawled out the bar on your hands and knees. Nobody wanted to mess with that.
Two chicks walked outta his room and all he did was beat his chest like LeBron and yell, "And 1!"
Because it's not worth it. And there is no nice way of saying "sorry, you're not good enough at sex for me to drive 45 mins"
Can I just go to one establishment in which I haven't banged anyone ?
I'm sorry I couldn't bail you out, apparenty they dont take credit cards over the phone. Did you at least make any friends in jail?
I just peed on myself the semester has officially began.
i read his ps3 instant messaging thing... he's meeting a guy to have sex. i think your boyfriend's gay
It's bullshittery. It's asshattery. It's complete fuckery at its finest.
Randomize
