Latenightwjoannablackberrywontletmespaceitknowsimdrunk
I never said you were fat, just too fat for ME
DUUUDE!! just found out that the fbi has a kids page. guess who's got a new jumior officer printout badge?
i talked to you about this last night, and you kept saying "he wants yo pusssaayyyyyy"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
That's fuckin bs. I had the bouncers beat by 30 yards til that dumbshit on the moped stopped in front of me.
I know you think I'm being paranoid, but can you please make sure Danny doesn't rub my wedding invitation on his balls?
I miss eating meals at a table and having unprotected sex..
Some idiot from high school is in the hospital for bonging three beers up his ass
He should have died. Natural selection.
They ran out of ice at the party, so I fixed my drink with frozen broccoli....the show must go on!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Watching him and my sister argue over a rum and coke about who's going to chop the coffee table in half with a hatchet...
I don't know where I keep finding these guys, but mi power bottoms es su power bottoms.
I just lost my handcuff virginity and not in the sexy way.
I just brought her a lipstick taser. So just remember that the next time you get smart with her
I just woke up and my ass is covered in honey and my eye brows are shaved off.
you know it was a good night when you wake up with a medal around your neck
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