kristin has been a bad kristin
He told me I remind him of his sister...
Was this before or after you did it?
before... I mean, it's been a long time. I just tried not to think of it during.
im sitting in my room wearing my power rangers shirt watching a movie about a magical dragon. Ive totally forgotten what having a sex life is like.
I just smoked a bowl while riding a horse. This has been a productive vacation.
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She was so happy she found her sunglasses, that she blew me. Im now randomly hiding things of hers in hopes she'll find them and I'll get a repeat performance.
somehow we got the entire party to start singing "ill make a man out of you" from mulan. needless to say, that kid had the best keg stand i'd ever seen.
Bartending School is so much more enjoyable now that I realized I was in rehab at this time last year.
Congrats on having the best tasting nipple at the bar last night.
Just paid off my possession ticket on 4/20. Helloooo awesome.
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I was like kind of drunk but mostly just very enthusiastic about beyonce
You're the horniest male I have ever encountered
Makes it sound like you're a scientist documenting your discoveries. I warned you.
Woke up on the couch with one cowboy boot on and a hat over my crotch. God bless texas.
I wish you could see all the crumbs in my bra....it looks like Hansel & Gretel got lost in my cleavage.
It's like we're in an emotionally distant three-way and there's not even sex to show for it.
And pointless. I'm fully vested in all my calories coming from booze today. The salad just fucks that shit up
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