I have nothing to say, just wanted ur phone to vibrate
I saw that some person on TFLN used a bag of wine as a pillow. I tried it last night. I forgot to close the spout. I woke up and thought my face had a period
he just flicked a booger into my mouth and shouted "goaaaal!"
i cant be the least bit upset about his new gf cause all i think is that she has to put things in his ass
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She keeps referring to it as an "us" Either she is seriously mistaken on what fuck buddies are or she learned another meaning of the word "us"
No, he attached a coozie to his crutches so he can carry his beer around the party.
I just saw her shopping list. The only things on it are blackberries, hot fudge and condoms. I almost don't wanna know. Almost.
Wow that was a lesbian tornado.
You convinced us both to take shots of jack Daniels through our eyes.
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I feel like his dick looks like a decorative autumn squash.
Everyone threw up but him. I took off my shirt because I puked on it. There were also a lot of drag queens involved.
Wow just saw this. Nothing like a little anal sex to ring in 2012.
And now she's hand feeding me pork rines and showing me her angry birds high scores. This is Vegas.
Sitting in my car feasting on the spoils of Taco Bell as Donna Lewis croons "I love you, always forever." A more perfect moment will never exist.
You're his holy grail. The moment he finally gets you to orgasm he'll probably just retire and become a monk.
How did you interpret 'wheat thins' from 'vaginal trauma'?