Vanessa Carlton's songs would be so much better if she was pretty
I'm looking at pot farms on google earth. Google should be proud I found a real purpose for it to serve.
I feel I need to conquer him. He's six ft eight and 265lbs. Its like the mount Everest of sex.
Just traded a samurai sword for some drugs. It's gonna be one random ass night
There are about 5 pictures of my dog taking a dump on my camera and 20 of Brandon taking one for "comparison" reasons.
My roomate asked me why she found condoms in the pringles container. I don't know what to tell her
I took my shirt off and stood in the kitchen for an hour and a half talking to his parents about my tattoos
How do you think the people in my class would react if I ripped all my clothes off and jumped on him right now?
No no don't get confused. We do chemistry homework on Thursdays. We screw on Fridays. Other than that, Words With Friends is our only communication five days a week. We are NOT dating.
If you end up at a gay bar on a tuesday night in steelers pjs, does that mean youve hit rock bottom?
I bought a vibrating wall dildo with my tax return. You?
I just want a boyfriend who will have sex to Disney Pandora.
He told me I'm a small core of pure evil wrapped up in sweetness, gold, and puppies. He gets me.
That is beautiful
Oh dear. Sending much love.
Just send a machete.
How much have you had to drink?
Qhaghao Oslo?
That seems like quite a lot.
Randomize
