return my video game
im giving 12 year olds life advice. this is probably illegal somewhere.
She just used a chaser for red wine.
she actually told me to ignore the cokeheads in the corner with knives.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
These people keep looking at me like I'm the first person to ever eat ribs in a Home Depot.
He left his own bachelor party to bring me weed. Then smoked with me. Tell me I'm not his favorite-ex-friends-with-benefits.
This guy just told me he wanted to bathe in bong water with me and then tried to lick my nipple through my bra. This could be love.
so hungover ... i gave my nephew five bucks to go blow bubbles for an hour in the kitchen.
I have 3 texts in my phone that say "Thanks King Tyler". I think I've successfully drank myself into a monarchy.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No no no he wouldn't talk to me before I showed his best friend how good I am at twerking
No. Every time we go there, you end up getting high, then lost, then going home with strangers.
the guy I've been trying to get with saw my brother's genitals before he saw mine, so that's my life.
Oh Jesus our whore days are numbered
I fear our relationship is coming to an end. Last night I felt the need to bloody apologise for waking him up with a blow job.
I didn't think you wanted your identity stolen along with your dignity. My mistake.
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