My grandmother just explained bulimia to me as a diet
My cha cha got a haircut
thank god. going down on you was like chewing on astroturf
I just walked by that girl who tried to commit suicide over me in high school. That was weird.
Goose bottles do NOT make good bowling pins
ill give you the fast version. Hooked up with 17 year old coworker while housestting for my boss
I don't know at which point last night turned terribly, terribly wrong, but it was somewhere around Motel 6, specifically the parking lot.
Hardest I think I've ever had to work for a shack. Whatevs. Still gonna get my way though. I'll start respecting myself on Monday
Your first mistake was not throwing your beer at the RA and running
Some guy is here using a taser on people. I'm up next
I unknowingly motorboated my boyfriend's ex-gf last night. Yay me!
Wife and kids came home early...naked passed out covered in chili cheese Fritos dad will haunt them forever.
Dude! We had to write our address on your arm in permanent marker so you wouldn't get lost. You just showed the cabbie your arm and he drove you! Nice guy.
Well he has a golden retriever set as his background so there's no way he was filming us having sex
It was a tough decision either lay in bed or go to work and lay in the stockroom
he's been 21 for 38 minutes and he's already trying to fist fight this dude over his girl
awwwww babys first drunken mistake
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