Watching NYC prep. Doing a shot everytime one of these d-bags flips his hair. I give it 10 minutes before alcohol poisoning set in.
I'm eating my dinosaur chicken nuggets in the order they would die in the food chain.
last night was the icing on my 3 week vodka binge cake
Awesome morning. I just met my boyfriend's wife, should I have shaken her hand or was the hug a tad over the top?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm having a flashback of telling a guy that he was beautiful and graceful like a unicorn while playing shuffleboard.
Maybe I should forgo underwear.
This is a family BBQ no?
Text me when you wake up so I know you're ok. It's really worrisome to get home at this hour and find 3 men passed out in my room but no you. Love you, goodnight. :-)
Since i didn't have a condom I told him to use jump ship method, I think I was overly invested in my sailor costume this year.
I am in my freshman residence hall trying to convince an Asian man to give me my pants back. Never. Drinking. Again.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
spring break - time to see if my two week detoxing gave my liver a chance to recover.
You came into my room and started rubbing a banana on your face.
I woke up in my tom cruise outfit with my house key tied to my thong....
Last night I got drunk on margaritas at an Irish pub and came home with only one shoe. I have to get my shit together.
You really know how to show Monday who's boss.
She called to say the cops were not fake cops. some one has to go get her in an hour
Holy shit my cat won't leave the lube alone
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