talk about how much treatments for your hpv hurts
I have said "that's the wrong hole" for the last time.
God I'm so bored. I wish I had a baby or something to play with.
And this is exactly why you should NEVER have kids.
i decided to cut a 3rd hole in to my snuggie so i could masturbate all the time.. all time low? or genius?
Wanna go watch Transformers and scream "AMERICA!"? I need a no thought activity
I tried exercising today. I ended up masturbating to the Wii fit trainer.
I am going to be fat forever.
yea. Don't mess. He will heal me. But my blowjobs will be historical.
yeah we were the ones eating jello shots out of the back of a jeep in the bar parking lot
it would be a downgrade if your vagina tasted like skittles
Just sucked some sandy dick on a boardwalk & now I'm at a family reunion hbu
I heard drunk is the new sober. I heard me say that. To a cop. Can you come get me??
We're trying to make our wedding vows nice but meeting on OkCupid fucks that up entirely.
They started shooting fireworks out of a dryer. It was my cue to leave.
Went to the lab to print and realized the guy next to me was the one we stole all the beer from last night..... Oops
i can do like, 15 pushups. 20 if i listen to dubstep.
Randomize
