toast her oven
toast her strudel
inspect her gadget
yeah I know. she is a stupid fat trailer trash bitchwhore and I hate her
but when she came up to me in the bar I had to be all like "OMG HEYYY how are you, I haven't seen you in foreverrrrr!!"
but for the record, yeah, I hope she gets mauled by a bear and dies
i had the deer in headlights look when she walked in and i was digging in her hamper
His mom took away his car and made him quit his job.
HE'S 26!!!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Only she could turn her genital wart appointment into a date night.
This guy just showed us his webbed feet to prove that his son was actually his son
It was really weird walking into a CVS and not going straight to the pharmacy for plan B.
you trust me enough to eiffel tower a girl but don't trust me with a mallet wtf happened to our friendsship
nothing like a walk of shame in front of a cnn news crew to start the morning off right
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Its fiiine, tuesday is like the thursday of wine wednesday. And i mean, free beer for girls at the grove...im not NOT gonna take that offer up!
Look at your life. Look at your choices.
I just remembered something. Did we really all flash the cab driver to get half off?
I'm just so happy. I go to sleep and when I wake up there will be chocolate milk and penis.
He fell backwards into a full bathtub but didn't spill a single drop of the beer in his hand. What a pro.
I've made this amazing blanket/pillow cocoon combo and I am set for life in here.
OH MY GOD I AM DYING. AS I WAS TEXTING I JUST BUMPED INTO A MOTHER FUCKING DEER. I AM SHAKING
Wait...Literally? You hit a deer...with your body?!
I PHYSICALLY RAN INTO IT. I FELT ITS WEIRD HAIR AND I EVEN APOLOGIZED CAUSE IT DINDT REGISTER THAT IT WASNT A PERSON. MORTIFIED.
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