after I pulled back my foreskin she said, "cool like a transformer". I really like her now.
found POGS while I was cleaning my room this morning. Definitely bringing them back to school to turn into a drinking game.
I DONT WANT TO PLUS I THINK I FLUSHED MY KEYS DOWN THE TOILET WHILE I WAS PEEING
He kept waking up periodically throughtout the night to bit my ear and pass back out.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The last good decent convo we has was when I was trying to convince you to let me watch you pee.
let's be real here, you have a beautiful vagina. this kid is a doctors son. that's a remedy for beautiful rich grandkids. he is just trying water his family tree, and make sure he doesn't end up in some piece of shit adult home. go for it.
I'm covered in sharpie and the girl next to me just said something smells like fried food. Hint: it's me. Why am I in class?
Pretty sure I just became my mom's wingman
I think as a general rule I have to have blacked out somewhere at least twice to be comfortable.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I started screaming "MY PARENTS ARE MORMON" at a stranger and promptly proceeded to run into a wall. How do you think it went?
I just woke and boke and made apple pancakes. I'm kicking Monday in the dick.
I don't trust my subconscious. It sleeps with my exboyfriend sometimes.
You peed in a public fountain and then felt bad so you put dish soap in it; 4 ft tall bubbles.
I'm pretty sure that cute cop drove me home. Especially since I found his card in my purse.
Thus began an intricate shell game of nude cardigan photos
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