I think she gave up trying 2 land a bf and let herself go
You misogynist thinking that every girl wants a bf
They do. I don't appreciate u using big words idk and im gonna take offense
i cleaned out my closet and found 7 beers from 2007. ive had 3 so far.
He made sure to throw up on the Mexico side of the border while we were in line at the check point. Then finished by screaming you an have it back. You can have it all back.
i was about to cum until he started doing shrek impressions.
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Next thing I know we're all standing in the kitchen holding hands and thanking God for the beer.
There are empty beer cans all over and the go-kart is missing. I need it for my halloween costume.
I made him sleep with a condom on and i passed out on the carpet with only a bra on.
I'm sorry the first time we hungout you had to witness me throw up in the ocean then army crawl to shore.
I sang again at the bar lastnight I don't think alanis morrset knew when she wrote you outta know that the drunk version was going to be go fuck yourself Josh and Chelsea. I love $2 wells.
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I can't. I will literally throw up my liver
Why dont you be an ebola patient for halloween? You can totally throw up and itll be part of your costume.
I told him that his face would look perfect between my legs. One of my most successful strategies yet.
I feel like we should build an island for girls that have committed atrocious numbers of unforgivable sins. We'll call it 'whore island' after the anchorman fashion.
Day two of not drinking, I think my cat is trying to eat me.
Psychosis secondary to sobriety???
This whole pope visit thing is ruining me having sex.
God I need to hump something, right now.
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