i googled "the goonies drinking game." i may be alone, but i'm living the college dream.
you went through ur friends list and posted an obscene comment on every ultrasound pic...."not his" "looks like a sea monkey"
I'd call her a cunt, but she dooesn't seem to have the depth or warmth.
You were plastered and wouldn't stop telling this hot girl about your plan to graffiti a church in easter colored spray-paint saying that Jesus was a Zombie... she kept saying her father was a pastor...
You kept making that girl eat peanuts, saying they were good for her baby..... I don't think she pregnant
He made me leave when I challenged "all you bitches" to a game of strip taboo.
Thanks for buying me a sippy cup, its so pretty and everyone keeps telling me its probably the best gift anyone could have given me
Well it's a moot point because I did have a sink & I peed in it.
It might've been him telling me last night that he "doesn't even need beer goggles to fuck me." When I thought that was sweet, I realized something needed to change.
Anywho, an ostrich attacked me today. Fucking useless pieces of shit birds.
People shouldn't leave you two alone together. You're just going to end up having sex.
I told him we could use my stove to make weed brownies, from that point on he kept reffering to me as "best pledge ever"
So I can officially say that someone has licked whipped cream off my nipples. Go senior year
god dammit I AM NO LONGER PUTTING UP WITH YOUR HETEROSEXUALITY I QUIT
I SWEAR TO ALL THAT IS HOLY I HAVE NEVER WIPED MY GENITALIA ON ANY TYPE OF EMERGENCY RESPONSE VEHICLE!!
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