doug butabi!
steve butabi!
hotties wanna shake it
I always feel awkward when im sitting at home watching the price is right and the fat contestant get the gym equipment.
so i'm just gonna leave my credit card in your mailbox so you can bail me outta jail.. deal?
It's impossible to flirt with the bank tellers because they see how broke I am.
The prostitute across the street from us is having a seizure on her front lawn again.
You act as if I'm the first person to pee in the Taco Bell drive thru at 2 AM, I'm sure a lot worse things have happen in that drive thru than my urine.
Would be fun, plus since its in public I'll keep my penis in my pants
Also, they sell weed-chocolate covered strawberries. For the romantic stoner.
That was one of the best texts I got today
But seriously who drew a dick on a tortilla and nailed it to the door?
when the repo soundtrack came on in the middle of us having sex i realized it was about time that i clear out my itunes library
I swear to god....if you can give yourself a brazilian you can take a fucking bullet
We were fucking in the boat on the lake when another boat saw us and honked their appreciation.
Ya apperently its not "appropriate" to fuck in the school auditorium
I came over to get dick...not to watch you vacuum....at 2 AM
I ripped my favorite bra in half last night while I was undressing in a drunken rage.
What was the rage all about?
He wouldn't stop to let me get McDonald's french fries.
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