I took shrooms, thc and molly but its okay i'm surrounded by freaks
ok so the lil girl sitting behind u was picking the hairs off ur sisters back and putting them in her mouth
She was really sick last night--but i was too drunk to bring her chicken noodle soup after the bar, so went by taco bell and got her a chicken burrito instead
ahh summer, the season during which the prefix for every verb is "get drunk and"
I have an asthmatic alcoholic for a roommate. That can't be safe.
Alright, so what's my next move? I already posted a Milli Vanilli video on her wall
He had to stop fucking her halfway through to do a shit. When he returned she was still waiting for him. The joys of MDMA
Unless you're gonna start buying my underwear, you have got to stop ripping it off of me.
The bag I'm bringing home for the weekend: a change of clothes, workout shoes, and sex toys, that's it.
How do I ask where the Jello shot cups are at Walmart without sounding like white trash?
Liquor doesn't fix sad, but it sure as hell lowers my standards for a rebound.
I figured if he was OK cheating on his gf with a guy, he'd be OK with me posting his number to m4m Craigslist Ads
I'm sorry you're hurting. Would a picture or my erect penis help?
I feel like ditching all logic and responsibility and get shit-faced before the week's over. Thoughts?
I lost my wallet so I paid for my cab ride home with a sausage sandwich I found in my purse. Must have thought it was my wallet.
Randomize
