just fell over trying to sit on the toliet like a robot.
OMG! Someone dumped chocolate soft-serve in the bathroom! Dibs!
Her life must suck. All she's got is "Miss Shamrock" WHICH SHE LOST!
Dude just fell down the stars trying to leave class early, the prof just looks down at him and says"thats what you get"
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I just drank Colt45 out of a champagne glass. I feel classy.
Colt 45 out of anything is classy.
terrible decisions. terrible terrible terrible decisions.
who'd you have sex with.
After we fucked he shhhh'd me and said your welcome
I don't care what you say about him, his cock is the stuff dreams are made of.
i also remember watching someone vomit off a balcony which was kind of grim
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So unmotivated today.
Who am I kidding. So unmotivated this decade.
...and now I welcome the sweet embrace of death.
Laying on my driveway in my pajamas in the sun having my severe hangover cigarette, and the daycare house across the street is having playtime in the yard! I believe I'm currently being what's known as a "bad example!"
I just found a nug casually in my room under my duffel bag. Is this a sign I need help?
i keep smelling vagina and donuts, which pretty much sumarises this morning. happy birthday.
The last thing I remember was them slipping shots into my beer bong, and me being happy about it
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