There's a sucker born every minute but swallowers are harder to find.
So glad I found your sister.
Well hey if hot cowboys are involved then all bets are off.
There's a high school volleyball camp on campus this summer. I'm definitely going to jail.
Im going to need an iv of taco bell after this.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i told them to call me paula dean as i was making all 10 for $10 boxes of pizza rolls in the microwave
He found my weave.. Think he'll still fuck me Friday? And how do I ask for it back?
Can we end it on a good note at least? Can we fuck and then never talk again?
Went to anytime fitness at 3:34 am drunk after the the bar and getting whataburger. Lifted weights with my cheeseburger between my knees. That's called DEDICATION.
She looked at my cock with a kind of resigned disappointment.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This hangover is so bad, we are pregaming Chinese food with pizza.
Look. If you get me out of this speeding ticket you can bang my sister. Or my mom. But not both.
Did copperhead road at the bar. All the girl next to me did was stare at my glorious bouncing tits. CAN I FUCKING HELP YOU?? I worked hard for these tits.
I sobered up and saw I was with the fat one and you had left laughing with the hot one. You're a terrible wingman, but an excellent manipulator
I just brought her a lipstick taser. So just remember that the next time you get smart with her
I don't know where I'm at. But I'm pretty sure what I'm looking at is a small bear.
Randomize