I don't know where I am but the food in the fridge is awesome.
woke up and her hair clip was clamped around my shaft
I told him I had my daily dose of vitamin c so i wouldn't blow him
At Wal-Mart last night I watched two guys scramble for $4.34 to pay for a pack of ping pong balls and red solo cups. They had to put the .34 on a credit card. Winter break begins!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you said "tonight pinky, we take over the world" and then came in my face
our health teacher's ringtone is Bad Romance and she has a tramp stamp. i will not skip this class, ever.
Thank God for cruise control and the Starbucks cup I had to puke in.
aparently i pased my english final. I don't even remember taking it.
and my souvenir for the night was a nice ambulance blanket
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Tonight was the second time that I've pretended like English was my 2nd language to avoid conversation w a creeper.
Is it weird that I noticed my lower half feels strange and then further realized it's bc I'm wearing underwear to bed for the first time in weeks..maybe months?
I just sent a bad sext to my sister. There's not even a way to damage control this, is there?
We played table tennis, but used tv remotes taped to our foreheads instead of paddles. Every time your opponent scored you took a shot. I'm the current champion as of last night.
Ended up in some house where this dude has a $1200 leopard cat
It's always appealing to be able to say to someone "I banged your mom"
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