he got wood on it!
i know. i had to sit in his lap on the plane. he also wore teva sandals.
...i was talking about hockey
Five things that make you perfect. Go.
The skin of a dead hooker. The blood of the innocent. The soul of a kitten. The hat from cat in the hat. And sunglasses.
Anyway, my grandfather thinks you're attractive
i have one hour to talk myself into enjoying giving him a blow job when i get home
Dude, if she brings up the lube, you know nothing
currently wearing a football players overly sized underwear. discovered a shot count on my leg. I'm a tank hahahhh
I would lick a homeless mans crack teeth for a cup of coffee right now.
We had half a pitcher of beer left and he asked us if we wanted a to-go cup. Fuck yeah we want it to-go.
At 12:16 am. We just got out of the truck and went behind it and fucked. With 3 people in the truck. On the side of the road. As cars drove by.
The inflatable penis from those pics was mine... We broke him that night
but there's so much I wanna do before I have kids. like die
I'm so hungover I just peed on my hand and left it, didn't wash... Killin it in 2915
I am googling "notable people who had syphilis"
I think someone shaved off all their pubes in the handicap stall or a werewolf stopped by the office to take a crAzy dump!
I would have wore underwear last night if I knew I had to change a tire this morning
Randomize
