i'm at a baby shower....never been happier to not be having sex currently
he had to chose between the booze and condoms
what did he choose?
the booze, then looked at me and said, plan b is free right?
So how many shot glasses of coffee grounds make a pot?
Babe. Honestly. Trust me. Your balls are not that big. And i'm eager.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Oh shit. There are penis maracas
Dinner?
YES CON MARGARITAS POR FAVOR!!!! MUCHO MARGARITAS!!!
YOU'RE FORCING ME TO BLOW A GUY BY NOT ANSWERING MY CALLS
you should probably know that there's a naked dude in your window
i wouldn't normally say anything but you seem to not be there
You know when you get a stripper pays your bail. You got good wood.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The difference in our lives is summed up perfectly in that you woke up next to a 6'4" guy with an accent and I woke up next to an unwrapped piece of string cheese.
I met someone else! And I had a wonderful orgasm! And he wants to see me again, like take me out!
let’s face it, me joining a co-ed soccer league is like, 33% motivated by my crotch seeking a healthy outlet
Worst wingman u don't do ANYTHING but laugh at my incompitant shyness
I stole $10 from the guy I hooked up with last night.Not sure why but it was definitely more satisfying.
Why does my nose taste spicy?
How do you know what your nose tastes like?
Randomize
