He looked like the mexican version of Steve Carrell with a unibrow.
And then I have a slight inkling that I went up to the bar and tried to order the bartender.
Is it wrong that im more embaressed about the karoke than the toplessness?
you started putting condoms on anything with a point, then you were yelling at the lamp for using your last condom...
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I woke up with my bra stapled to the ceiling, her dad was in the hallway winking at me. I was the less drunk of the bunch.
It's like the last supper of drinking before the summer ends
If your relationships aren't working out because she doesn't have a penis THEN maybe you should give dudes another go
I deleted his number so I had to go into my old voicemails which are saved through my gmail and search his name... Never underestimate the resourcefulness of a drunk girl on a mission for dick
eating jello out of the cup. with my face. while on the toilet. i am at my lowest.
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Lets go hit some boners bro!
I appreciate the acceptance and inclusion, but that's not how we gay men talk.
Adults smoke weed in footie pajamas man. You just gotta accept me for who I am.
He called his dick "The Beast" and said he lived "The Beast Life". He was pretty but it was better if he didn't talk.
Honestly, I want an afternoon of mild abuse, mixed with face fucking and general molestation that turns in love making, laughter and cinnamon toast crunch naked in bed.
ready for a night of bad decisions, horrible moral standards, and an unhealthy amount of illegal substances.
Dude my cat is eating sugar cookies with me. No joke. My cat likes cookies.
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