why did i save someone in my phone as corn dildo?
I am no longer a man. I just realized I prefer Spongebob to college football.
how many princess gummy vitamins will it take to negate last nights drinking binge?
do you ever get flashbacks of ppl you had sex with and just shudder at how gross they were/how drunk you were?
story of my life.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think we need to find a happy medium between fried food and dicks. This could end badly.
Stop. He threw up in front of Madison Square Garden security. Spit at the guys feet and grunted ughhh at him.
It's ok, I like adventure. Just ask my vagina.
When exactly does a bender just become a lifestyle?
Mom chose Thanksgiving to tell me the reason I am here is because she was too tired to give my dad a BJ and too drunk to make him pull out.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I had lunch with him today and quietly mourned his wasted good looks on such a disappointing set of genitals.
i decided if i had to, i could survive with only 3 fingers on each hand.
Stay positive! You think people like sad vaginas? NO! You'll get some!
He asked me who my new boyfriend was and I showed him a picture of my sex toys.
The next time you invite me out to a bar full of cougars warn me first. I never felt like a piece of meat before.
I just Spray tanned myself while high as fuck its either going to look like a work of art or terrible graffiti
Randomize