whjeg hajt iyt
say what?
wanna hang out?
She punched me in the face after i pulled it out and grabbed my cell phone. Ill be the one hiding in the bushes with one shoe.
I think that i just found proof that harry and ginny had sex
Talking her gay man friend into dancing with me officially makes me the world's best wingman. ever.
Hands down, the girl passed out in the bathroom was the best looking. Concious or not.
We started a mustache riot at white castle at 4 in the morning. Will explain in detail.
Just signed my boyfriend up on a dating website so I could officially have a reason to leave him for my hot neighbor.
Way to high for badminton right now. This is gonna be a shitshow.
Just for the record its a bit awkward when you introduced me to your friends at your house as your brother and then insisted in front of them that I sleep in your bed with you
I drank enough to tranq a steed. You really missed out
Ladies and gentlemen, the only person I know who would keg stand in pearls and a bow.
You kidnapped her dog. I don't care that you and the dog are epic bros, that's just not cool. Return him.
Just puked in a cup. Poured it out the window.
The guy got mobbed on, all hell broke loose. About 20 cops showed up, and this kid somehow convinced a cop that letting him pee in front of him is justifiable. This guy could sweet talk Hellen Keller, he was THAT good
You where banging on the wall asking us where we hid the door...you then crawled under the deck thinking you'd be safe. I told you to eat the nachos before the party...I told you.....
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