Nice meating you last night
Not a typo
I thought he was joking about bailing you out until I saw the picture of you and the sheep in the morning paper. Were those my boots you had on it
i just stepped in cum. i hate you.
Thats what happens when you don't swallow.
Oh my god, I hid a wine bottle in my boot.
i screwed him while his gf was puking in the shower. 2011 is looking up already
He was just laying on the stairs and then screamed, "Is that a clubhouse?" I haven't seen him since
I need a pic of your cock for our cock collage
Dude you spent 20 minutes on the phone with dominos answering machine trying to order a pizza
My father is flirting with a transexual server at hamburger mary's. We can never tell him.
It is not if she takes a guy home Karaoke night. It is how many.
This drunk lesbian I just met keeps trying to shove sushi in my mouth. Help.
I made a White Russian but saw how early it was and decided to substitute it for milk in my lucky charms. This is what it means to be an adult.
I continue to impress myself. Also I'm probably pregnant
It's okay to admit that you're into redheads.
Just a typical Friday. Dinner, drinks, doing lines with a member of Congress
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