The walk of shame has never felt more glorious... I think it's the somberero
guess they didn't have any donuts in her size.
she has over 3,000 tagged photos on facebook. dont tell me she isnt annoying.
my mom said i couldn't bring cigarettes cause it was a family trip, which was really irresponsible of her because now i have to walk around the beach drunk trying to find someone with cigarettes.
Sweet and genuine is kinda lame. I'm more of a bust all over your face and hair kinda guy.
Uhm the hair is off limits bro, conditioner can only go so far.
Bro? You just made it a target.
I feel like a color. Like a wavy color
Oh, fuck yeah. I swear I came with every bite. Not even joking. Messiest meal ever.
Wow, thanks for ruining pizza for me. I didn't think it was possible.
You know it's a good weekend when you wake up on Sunday questioning your sexuality.
He doesn't drink liquor so instead of doing a body shot off my belly button he dropped water in there and sipped it out with a straw. Look at my face: =|
As a friend tho, you have the biggest dick I've ever seen
Do you think my laundromat will notice that the bloodstain on my sheets is in the shape of a face?
I don't know what happened last night. But I just woke up in the high school boiler room
WE JUST PASSED A FUCKING SPACE SHIP! NOT JOKING! A REAL FUCKING SPACE SHIP! THIS IS NOT THE DRUGS! SPACE! SHIP!
Our orgasm ration was 1:45. No. Fucking. Joke. I thought I was going to die.
I'll bring spiced rum
I am not drinking that devil juice
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