What started out as a threesome has become me sitting here watching them have sex... Can I get a ride home?
he keeps dipping things in ranch and feeding them to me
i don't mind that he's uncut. i like it! it's like a little sweater!
a cock doensn't need a sweater! especially a skin sweater! wtf.
That's like some buffalo bill hannibal lector shit.
so i told him i still liked him. he laughed
well, your crazy. what did you expect?
im shaking like a drug addict and i almost just shat my pants when i sneezed...no more patron for me
So about class tomorrow..... i,ll be there. But I may be still a bit drink and wearing a suit. I'll explain when I get there.
She looks makes a Zellweger face when she cums, she's keeps asking why I call her renee
i'm having flashbacks of crying and telling you i was made out of egg salad.
In college, I had one standard. Penis. A lot has changed since then. Now I really only have one standard. Breathing.
I spent most of the night trying to drink out of three bottles of beer at once. I don't have to be told the reasons I'm single
Carving a pumpkin in a gay bar at 2am. How did my life get to be this way.
I found a half composed text to you this morning and all it said was HELP M. Is that how I ended up at the bottom of the stairwell in only a tee-shirt and one heel?
considering I never received the text I would go with 'yes'.
Remember that time I got suspended in eighth grade, well it was like that but I was on acid and wearing goggles
showering high made me realize that i should seriously reconsider my career path... id be a damn good hair shampooer & head massager
Do you think Ashley had her twin sister tag in for our date? The sex was different and I think a mole was missing
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