Outside the community dumpsters: beer bottles and a carton of orange juice. Looks like we were here.
so when he was about to cum, he screamed his mother's name and continued to pray for forgiveness. wtf
She's a virgin AND a minister's daughter. We're one schoolgirl outfit from the dear penthouse trifecta
I tried to take a photo for proof but couldn't hold my penis, camera, and measuring tape all at the same time.
If you're wondering where your left shoe is you lost it in a bet with a homeless guy last night
i ended up playing naked naked monopoly and hangman with my dealer. i really love my life.
I'll remember. Also, I owe you 200 for a pair of shoes that I carelessly bought to improve my spinal structure, to improve my health and ensure that I love to be 300 years old. Like Adam. Of the bible.
I found my grandmother's vibrator, how was your day?
I now have a other guy willing to drive 3 hours for my vagina. At my next gyno appointment I'm asking her if there's cocaine in there.
Discovery: there is a folder in my pictures labeled "Your Name and cats"
I don't know which is worse, the fact that his name is Kevin or the fact that he has a pornstache.
I'm serenading his dick with my words. I understand how poets get inspiration now.
I guess what I'm trying to get to is that my dog sneezed on my dick earlier and its really taken the joy out of my evening.
Update: He still has devil magic genitals.
I hate her so much I want to fuck her boyfriend.
Randomize
