Who do you think planted the wheat? Who do you think cleared the land and killed off the native inhabitants? Women?
Whatever is fine with me, as long as I am dressed in green and end up shitfaced.
He let me keep his flannel as a "good job" for the great head I gave him.
I wonder what acid is like for a blind person... Can we find this out?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
can't blv i tried using a "backpack" as a unit of measurement...i drank a lot of beer last night
He screamed AMERICA, took a shot of vodka out of a Tupperware container, and then asked if he could see my tits
I'm not sure drinking my way through west nile virus is the best idea. Oh well, already committed to that plan.
I was on my way last night when some asshole yelled "make better life choices" out the window of his car. I felt so self conscious I went home.
and if planning a fake elopement keeps me from fucking strangers and doing drugs, i think it's good for me
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Using mass transit when I'm hungover makes me feel like I missed my calling as a serial killer
It all started with sending him a text about Spongebob. It escalated from there.
Be safe. If you have intercourse with a boy use so many condoms this his penis is no longer recognizable.
Is it okay to get drunk at a baby shower? ....asking for a friend
Whoever jacked off in MY pong room on the bean bag with your fucking googles pick up your fucking cum towel you gross disgusting fucks. I said NO MORE jacking off in that room. I swear I will empty it out if this is going to continue.
If I stopped mid-sex because the guy was hung like a light switch, it doesn't count, does it? Like the five second rule.
Randomize