Anthony wouldn't know good sex if it sat on his face
the $20 limit for secret santa doesn't apply to me cause you know a half gram of coke is more than $20
It smelled like mall pretzels. Of course I investigated.
On the bright side since it was a Tuesday you weren't even in jail for the long! that could've been worse!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
How can you turn a kayak date down? I'M TALKING RIVER HEAD HERE.
The last thing I remember is trying to split my bridesmaid dress down the back like the incredible hulk.
and you succeeded.
I know I'm not the first to fuck in a park but i deserve props for doing it at 3pm. On a sunny day might I add.
Stole a wheelchair from the hospital and rolled down the street smoking and drinking this is my weekend
I hooked up with a 20 year old last night. I feel like a hocus pocus witch that sucked life from a child.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have a very important question for you: what are some good rules to have if we want to turn the nfl draft into a drinking game?
I have to deal with three things I do not like this weekend. Pooping in toilets that are not mine. Air mattresses. Not beating off in the shower.
She looked up at the menu and yelled this is my absolute favorite literacy
I wish I got like a congrats basket for being a responsible sexually active member of society complete with condoms, tissues and lollipops.
Learn from my mistakes, you naive soul: Gay love triangles are just as dangerous as straight love triangles.
I was left to my own devices with nothing to do but drink
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