i nerd-gasmd. plain and simple.
I can't remember last night. I must have yelled at your girlfriend til she cried again.
Yup.
dude my 8 year old cousin is allowed to drink wine coolers. as long as its infront of my aunt. wtf
we are torturing ourselves with these mediocre cocks
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Clusterfucked is a frowned upon word in work related emails
No need to call an exterminator, the ants overdosed on the leftover lines on the counter.
Smoked a joint with my old camp counselor and now we're going to a strip club. There is a god.
Something bad happened. I'm just giving you some notice. So you can smoke some pot and hide all sharp items in the house.
Yes dating, but it seems easier to just live in a perpetual state of Netflix, internet porn, and cheese.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I work 80 hours a week to prevent myself from just laying in bed and masturbating all day. It's a hands off strategy.
never stay at a party until 5am. even if it's because of daylight savings. we ended up having to watch porn with the host's dad...
I laid naked in his bed as he brought me an ice cream sandwich so I would say everything worked out great
I got poked in the eye with a penis last night. How's your day?
I sent her a video on Snapchat of me cumming, with a Father's Day snap filter that said "#1 Dad".
Apparently someone was hiding in a storm drain dressed as Pennywise from it and offering passersby free penis enlargement pills.
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