Nevermine. I'm just going to tell you on Myspace with a glitter graphic.
What can I say...he's packing some serious heat down there. You wouldn't expect that looking at him, huh?
I guess God knew he was going to be bald...
I just don't have the heart to tell my mom you peed in our washer machine last night.
i secretly love the power trip of being their RA & busting these idiots for everything i did as a freshman
He completely dissapeared at the baseball game. We found him passed out at the hotel three hours later with souviner photos of himself at the top of the Sears Tower.
I am making pancakes and watching Spongebob Squarepants. My life is a waste of youth.
I think the threesome was inevitable when she walked out in nothing but his boxers followed by him completely naked.
Does it qualify as sexting if you're both pretending to be fictional characters?
I'm not sure whether to be proud of you or weirded out.
I did it on acid. I can cook bacon on any condition
When you're really drunk, Japanese toilets just have an unnecessary amount of buttons.
It's nice out. . But after I almost put a bag of chips in the microwave to make nachos. ..I figured it best to not venture too far from the couch
Easter was a success. We had an egg hunt and hid weed and conforms inside them. Cooked a ham, made some jello, got wasted. THIS is adulthood?!
Dude. I've been high for so many hours now that I'm just accepting this as my new reality.
HE WAS SUPPOSED TO BE THE TROPHY HUSBAND! I WAS GOING TO BE THE SUCCESSFUL ONE!
I mean really am I setting up a snapchat when I'm 40 so I can send nudes to my 23 yr old bf? yes, yes I am. Where is my life heading.
Randomize
