im pretty sure there are laws against slapping prostitutes
i'm pretty sure there are laws against prostitutes.
Michelle and I recorded her bunny humping it's little rubber black ball.
Just saw ur first draft of ur suicide note.
You spelled "worthless" wrong.
dude you cant keep breaking into my house just to raid my fridge.. especially at 3AM.
i just feel like it would be irresponsible for you to not have sex with me again.
My vagina agrees.
okay, please tell me Cammy is the one who put the picture and note on my desk saying "beat off to this homeboy"
It's fine...I've done worse things to better people.
Um...celebrating is an understatement. You flashed the guy at the mexican restaurant and then screamed, "It's just my bikini, I swear!"
Judging by the fact that he asked me if i wanted to serenade him using cocaine and Taylor Swift I'd say I so have it in the bag.
I only remember singing the Captain Planet theme song on our way to the bars.
My drug dealer bought me a book for Christmas. What a gentleman.
U NO SLUT. YOUR HEART IS JUST FREE.
my face feels like mints and my body feels like tingles
The best part of last night is not remembering half of it
There is a baby in my apartment. What the fuck happened last night?
Randomize
