the #6 from wendy's when stoned is definitely better than sex. i dont care what anyone says.
If I die and they 'assume' it's natural causes, just go with it.
He's been dancing to the same Rob Thomas album in his room for almost 8 hours now. Please never, ever bring extacy over here again.
The one from last night got me a whole floor of Eskimo Brothers. There was a celebration of high fiving as I left
Yes, that's a picture of my balls. It isn't however an answer to my question.
She just kept screaming you name over and over. Im starting to think this is my alarm clock
We talk about tequila and blow jobs the way that normal people talk about the news and the weather.
The "don't get cum on anything" rule also applies to my furniture and scarves
That's not technology. Doesn't count.
Dude you're alone at a bar with a woman, and you're talking about my junk?
the amount of chicks and firearms here is unnerving. this will end awesomely or at the morgue.
I think we can all agree that the size of her boobs, combined with beer, is destroying my ability to judge looks.
I think this bruise on my arm is actually an impression of your face
Its almost 1 am and u wanna get together and cry naked
I pretended to be blind and he pretended to be my assistant and long story short, we had to buy that bra and panty set, and now we're both banned from Victoria's Secret AND I have a cum stained demi cup.
Well I kept shouting "you're groovy" at him and then I had a 15-minute argument with the bouncer about how many 9s there are in 100... it was definitely time to go home.
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