It looked like if robin williams had a vagina
Tell Heather sorry for burning her hair. Also for anything else that I may have done that warrants and apology. Anything after about 10pm is kind of hazy.
Omg. I bid $3000 on a cave in Afghanistan on EBay last night.
Has anyone ever told you you're majestic like a sea turtle when you fuck?
And your cock privileges have been revoked.
You know its been a rough night when for a large portion of the evening you have accepted your death
All in all only spent $2 at the bar ln... Fucking love having a vagina
I should start wearing my Batman shirt more often when I drink. Good things happen. All sorts of shit.
I mean like if I stood up my head might pull me down like an anchor
Fun thought: I realized the thing I miss most about him is dixie kong's double trouble on his super Nintendo. It's possible that I don't have a soul.
well that's what you get for sleeping with a guy called 'the defiler'
Nothing can teach you regret more efficiently than a wine hangover.
I promise that I won't shotgun beers with your boyfriend this time, Scouts Honor.
WTF I can't even get a boyfriend here and you're getting nudes from across the country
See I insist I'm not a groupie and then I say things like "will bang for a backstage pass".
You wrapped yourself in tin-foil and told us you were Iron Man. I have pictures.
Randomize
