new midget porn idea. Wizard of Jizz: Munchkins Revenge
Here's a fun fact your kittens ate my vomit last night
Wow. Thanks for becoming another fan of something on Facebook. You make me want to gouge my eyes out.
gettin drunk isnt as much fun when i can use my own id for it
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
in hindsight, the duct tape banana hammock was a bad idea.
Truth be told I was googling "why is my left calf bigger than my right calf", porn would've been a better excuse for a virus.
Snuck into a camper in someone's yard. Hotboxing. Can't wait until they go in it.
Holy shit, you lost your virginity on 11/11/11. Now every time someone fucks you, they can make a wish. Your vagina has officially been transformed into a wishing well.
I picked up the bartender so he could open the bar early and ended up with him giving me a ride home when he closed. I like snowdays and everything, but they get really expensive. Also, I think I threw up on his front door. Not checking.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Drunk logic "let's go outside in front of the bar to get sick"
I just realized my new apartment is at the corner of Patrick Henry and Mary Jane.
Give me weed or give me death?
WTF? Why is there a pic of my tits in ur dad's office?
How do you get the "hangs out with drunk assholes" insurance
He had a vasectomy. I think I'm in love.
i just realized i have only had sex on couches so far this year. i can't decide if that's impressive or trashy
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