Fyi I let myself into your place, I'm wearing some of your clothes in your bed. Come take them off
he gave me an orgasm. multiple times. the weird stuff he did in middle school is now irrelevant.
woman puking in liquor store parking lot at 9:30 on a tuesday morning = best commute ever.
Fuck him tonight for the both of us. We're still tag-teaming in spirit.
I didnt realize my nipple ring fell out until he coughed it up.
lets be honest. she's not NEARLY as much fun to fb creep since she got out of rehab...
then out of nowhere we heard a voice yell "Fuck that pussy!"
I wouldn't necessarily say I'm in her pants...I'd say I'm more on the on ramp to the freeway to the long way to her pants. There really isn't a short cut.
Bring gay.
By that I meant the rum. I just realized that my request made no sense. You always bring gay.
you taught an eight year old how to shotgun a half pint of chocolate milk, that's all i'm saying
You partied and then got cock slapped, Don't tell me you didn't have fun
HE HAS CHALLENGED MY BADNESS. I MUST CONQUER ALL THAT QUESTIONS MY POWER. BRING FORTH THE TIT PICS.
I'm thinking my boss switched to all cordless keyboards and mouses so that none of us would hang ourselves in the office.
now acid just makes me think of crab ragoon
She stood up through my sunroof the entire drive home. screaming her ass off and singing free falling..
Randomize
