I would drag my balls through a mile of broken glass to eat pudding out of her anus
Why didn't you tell me that Dad was a registered sex offender?
We were going to tell you eventually, how'd you find out?
Our school resource officer showed us how to use Family Watchdog and pulled up his picture.
New Jersey isn't a real state, it's just a myth you tell little kids to scare them like Canada or Carrot Top
They were done having sex when I went to the room. They had that look on their faces.
Disappointment?
There I was staring at a teeny weeny black one and a huge white one. It was like an episode of Myth Busters
you know, even black out drunk I can always remember the exact point where I should have stopped drinking.
You told him that your vagina was the "King Crab" of all vagina's.
Some girl, somewhere, is going to wake up with my face paint on her vagina
My prof gave me extra credit for drawing a ninja on my paper and writing "ninja will up my grade"
How sad is it that I'm looking in the farm & garden section of craigslist to find a weed dealer. I mean, that's where they'd be right? Just gotta break the code.
Please tell me I didn't help an old woman shave her vagina last night. Please.
That's the least of the fucked up shit you did last night dude.
I just wish he'd leave so I can vomit in peace.
I found a video on my phone from last night... You got up on the table at McDonald's and screamed BURRITOOO!
Should I be worried if two ants just crawled out of my purse?
Yes!
You sent me a pic of you peeing in two separate directions
and like half a dozen dick pics
Randomize
