I am in shape. i keep telling you that.
Round is not "in shape," it's "a shape."
i find it a beautiful talent that i know how much pubic hair the girl in the next stall has just from the sound of her urine
dude i just heard a girl tell another girl 'what part of im trying to get laid tonight dont u understand?'
needless to say i wont be back home tonight
Just threw up my room service breakfast with my fake eyelashes and pearls still on.
I am currently eating pure cake frosting...I am not sure how I was ever referred to as a responsible adult.
he legitimately fell asleep standing up at the club. everyone was impressed
no normal human would even think about making waldo slutty but you
Yeah well margarita Wednesday already came twice this week and it's just now Wednesday
We will. we just need a little inspiration.... in smoke form.
Bake him heart shaped cookies?!? Send him a picture of your tits like an ADULT!
When we were finished I asked him how long it had been since he'd cum that hard. He thought really hard for a while before telling me his brain forgot how years worked.
He sent a video of him jacking off....class will be awkward tomorrow
Oh I fucked him, definitely. We played Strip Halo.
I knew it was love when he told me he wants to see me have multiple orgasms in one night
That's the second time the same cop pulled me over well a different girl was giving me road head
Randomize
